"Macy's... It's like Belk"

I also had this encounter at the law school Halloween party last night:

My roommate saw a fellow classmate, and the girl introduced herself as being "bling" for Halloween. By "bling" I mean that which often hangs from the neck of a rap star.

Her outfit consisted of jeans, a bedazzled top, and really gaudy but oh-so-fitting "costume" jewelry. My roommate inquired as to where Bling had purchased her bling, and she replied, "Target".

While it was an impulsive speculation, I wagered that the top looked like a higher quality than Target, so I couldn't resist asking: "You bought that top at Target?!"

"Oh, no," she says. "I got this at Macy's. It's like Belk."

It's like Belk?

(Pregnant pause to process what had just taken place.)

I survey my outfit, beginning with my BCBG Max Azria off-the-shoulder top, then down to my Diane von Furstenberg pumps and over to my left arm accessorized with David Yurman. And as I grasped my Kate Spade clutch, I remembered that I did not need to check my Nars-painted lips because I had touched them up not two minutes before exiting the car.

So I have to ask:

Did she really just feel the need to explain Macy's to me?! (With indignant high-pitch southern drawl that goes up half an octave at the end.)

Of course I conveyed my exchange with Bling to my roommate. Also possessing fashion sense, my roommate rolled her eyes and picked up with her daily rant about how no one in her class knows how to coordinate an outfit and that rolling out of bed she is dressed better than most of the school. Having spent countless hours with local law school students, I can attest to this.

To put this into context, Belk is a regional department store in the Deep South. Belk carries respectable lines of clothing, so I intend no disrespect toward the company. But as someone who receives the Neiman Marcus catalogue and has a subscription to Vogue, I was indignantly taken aback that Bling would feel the need to explain Macy's to me in terms of Belk.

I'm going to nix that as part of her charm and just say this:

Bless her heart.